Resolved
As the new year wears on, experts weigh in to help anyone struggling to make resolutions stick.
by Bill Donahue

For some, January 1st is just another day. For others, it’s one of 365 opportunities to make meaningful improvements to their lives. 
 
Wanting to change is essential, but hitting a target requires much more than good intentions. In order for a so-called resolution to become reality, people need to have certain tools in their toolbox—namely, an honest and clear-minded goal, an accountability partner, and a reason why.
 
On the following pages we speak with local professionals who have devoted their time and energy to helping people make true and lasting improvements. Maybe you want to eat more healthfully and lose weight. Perhaps you want to return to the gym and reclaim your “beach body.” Maybe you’ve committed to stop procrastinating in regard to preparing for the future, financially speaking. Or maybe you’re ready to learn a new skill and change careers.
 
No matter the goal, consider this your guide to getting there—and making it stick.
 
Fitness: ‘Find a Reason Why’
Personal fitness altered the trajectory of Charles Knowles’s life. If it hadn’t, he admits he might not be here today.
 
“My father died of a heart attack at 38, and that event changed everything for me,” he says. “A lot of bad things happened after that, and turning to fitness helped me get through it all and get me to where I am now.”
 
Today, Knowles helps other people get in “game shape” through his Conshohocken-based enterprise, Vision Plus Fitness. He and his staff train the full spectrum of clients, from those who are just starting out to those who are looking to maintain peak fitness. 
 
Knowles says January and February tend to be among the busiest times of the year for businesses such as his. Many people come in expecting quick results, and then get frustrated when results take longer to come by. Rather than focusing on how they look in the mirror, he advises clients to focus on how they feel and defining the “why.”
 
“Your goals aren’t going to stick if your why isn’t big enough,” he says. “You have to be able to answer the question, ‘Why am I doing this?’ before those doubts creep in. Maybe it’s wanting to be there for your kids. Maybe it’s your job. Maybe it’s building wealth. You can build all the wealth you want, but you need to be alive and healthy in order to enjoy it.”
 
Knowles’s best nuggets of advice: Be a little selfish, and find a mentor. The smartest man in a room is probably in the wrong room, he suggests, because there’s little to no improvement to be had. The same, he believes, applies to personal fitness.
 
“We all want to be the best possible person, but we can’t do that if we don’t take an hour out of our day to do something that’s good for us,” he says. “Also, get around people who want the same thing as you. … If I’m out of shape, I want to get around people who are in shape, and then tweak the formula to suit my goals. You have to be around people who are where you want to be or are traveling the same road.” 
—Bill Donahue
 
Health: ‘Focus on Small Changes’
Nearly 75 percent of Americans ages 20 and older are overweight, and more than 40 percent are obese, according to figures from the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. At the start of a new year, many Americans say, “It’s time to make a change,” but by February or March find themselves struggling to keep their resolutions. Janine Darby, M.D., a board-certified physician and the owner and founder of Lifestyle Changes LLC, shares her expertise on losing excess weight and maintaining a healthy lifestyle for the long term.
 
“It’s all about setting personal goals, not making resolutions. When it comes to losing weight and feeling healthier, I usually talk about the three M’s: mindset, meal planning, and movement. These three components will help you make a lifestyle change, increase your energy, and manage your weight. Establishing a good mindset doesn’t happen overnight. The big thing is to not tear yourself down, to start from a place of love and acceptance, and to see yourself as someone who is empowered. Instead of looking for problems, look for solutions. Also, focus on small changes instead of an all-or-nothing mentality. 
 
“We have to change our thinking in terms of how we look at food. Everyone is busy, but meal planning helps us ensure that our bodies are getting the proper nutrition. When you’re trying to lose weight, 90 percent is nutrition and 10 percent is exercise. I provide my patients with customized meal planning, including recipes and a grocery list, so they know what their meals for the week will be; all they need to do is prepare them. Subscription meal-delivery services can be very helpful. My family uses Sunbasket, but there are so many out there—Blue Apron, Freshly, and Purple Carrot, to name just a few. Comfort foods are OK, but it depends on what the comfort food is. A lot of people go to carbohydrates and sweets, but excess carbs can lead to unwanted health issues, like diabetes. There are stress-fighting foods that still taste good, like dark chocolate, avocados, and nuts, all of which are good go-to foods that still provide some comfort. Of course, everything should be in moderation.
 
“The pandemic has definitely made health and wellness a challenge. We have to be more intentional about what we’re eating when we spend more time at home, because the pantry and fridge are right there, and there’s the temptation to graze. Another component is movement. Many people have sedentary jobs that put them on the computer for much of the day. I recommend setting aside times for movement. The goal for most people should be 150 minutes of moderate exercise per week, or 75 minutes of vigorous exercise per week. Strength training is just as important as cardio. To me, the foundations of health and wellness are a well-balanced diet, including drinking plenty of water; exercise, which also helps with mental and emotional wellbeing because it releases endorphins that can help prevent anxiety and depression; and a good night’s sleep, which helps with our energy and mental sharpness.
 
“Whenever I’m first starting to work with someone, we talk about current habits. Maybe they have a cocktail or a glass of wine with dinner. I don’t deprive patients of the things they crave, but we do talk about alternatives and healthy choices. With alcohol, I’ll talk to them about drinks with a lower caloric intake and give them the hierarchy, meaning the lowest caloric drinks versus the higher ones; champagne is lower, followed by beer and then cocktails. The same goes for favorite foods; I may suggest changing their snacks—nuts over chips—while they are actively losing to weight.  
 
“Anytime you’re working toward a goal, accountability is essential. Some people are turning to Peloton to have an accountability partner, and there are a lot of apps and devices with health-related software to keep people on target. Many people have a fear of failure or deprivation when they begin a weight-loss journey; they fear the food may not be as exciting, or maybe they hate exercising. With any program, you should not feel deprived or like you’re making drastic changes, because that’s going to reduce your chances of success. What I’m teaching is gradual lifestyle changes to lead you to a healthier, happier life.” 
—As told to Bill Donahue
 
Purpose: ‘Know Your Core Values’
We all know someone who has uttered the phrase, “I’m having a midlife crisis.” Perhaps we have even said it ourselves. Often, these crises come from the realization that we have veered off course and are not living the kind of life we set out to lead. Joan Summers, a reiki master, a certified trauma-competent professional, and a certified graduate of the Equine Gestalt Coaching program, as well as the founder of Step Into Joy Healing Arts in Doylestown, specializes in helping people rediscover joy and pursue lives of passion and purpose. She offers her perspective on how to make a life-changing “course correction” with confidence.
 
“First, you have to understand that from the moment you were conceived, you were good enough. In other words, you don’t have to prove yourself to anyone, and you don’t have to make yourself any bigger than what you are. The next step is to ask that which you are connected to—whatever you believe is that higher power, if it’s God, the divine, the universe, energy, something that makes all of this happen—to give you the answer and to accept the fact that it will come in perfect time, always in perfect time. 
 
“You also have to know your core values, what you value most. If you’re changing your life in any way, whatever your choices are, you have to be able to answer the question, ‘Are my core values covered here?’ It’s about understanding your temperament and discovering what your true passion is. For me, it’s making a difference in the world. For some, it might be adventure, a spiritual path, a passion for animals, or a passion for the financial world. For many of us, that passion has existed for a long time, but it has been snuffed out or smothered, and we have to get back to when we experienced freedom in our lives. 
 
“The things you are passionate about will help you understand your purpose. You also have to accept that you need to earn a living. If it is your true work, it’s amazing how it comes together. I talk a lot about how to manifest the life we want. Like energy attracts like energy; if we walk around feeling freedom and joy, we will attract more of it. If you’re just starting out, though, remember that this is your creation, your baby, and you wouldn’t ask your baby to support you. You need to support it and do the work you need to do until your baby is big and strong enough to support you. 
 
“One of the things that gets in the way of making changes in our lives is that we don’t know what the first step is and then we worry about all the other steps. Just focus on the first step. If your house is filled with clutter, it can be so overwhelming that all you want to do is sit down and watch TV. Start with cleaning up one corner in one room. Start with one bookshelf and don’t think about anything else until it’s done, and then choose another. Whatever the first step is, make sure it’s reasonable. It’s a process of releasing the fear, because love and fear can’t exist in the same space.
 
“All of these things demand that you are in the present moment. Our subconscious is trying to get our attention, sort of like a three-year-old child tugging on a shirtsleeve. Give yourself the time to be present, and it does not have to be done sitting in the lotus position or doing yoga; you could be walking in nature. When we are still and in the present moment, we are allowing the answers to our questions to present themselves. Your subconscious will say, ‘Aha, the door is open,’ and if you’re listening you’re going to hear the answer.”
—As told to Bill Donahue
 
Wealth: ‘Create the Life You Want’
Most people prefer not to discuss money. For Dawn Santoriello, CFP®, talking about money has become a way of life, even a mantra.
 
Santoriello was motivated by the desire to transcend poverty. She and her sister were raised by their grandmother and later moved in and out of foster homes. Eventually she and her sister were adopted and raised in a home with loving parents.
 
“I knew I never wanted to be poor again and became fascinated with finding ways to make and save money,” says Santoriello. “Even as a child, I had an entrepreneurial spirit.” 
 
She took every opportunity to earn money: helping her father clean up the yard, filing papers in his office, shoveling driveways in the winter, selling lollipops at school, etc. Ultimately she realized that a career in financial planning would enable her to “help other people gain financial security and avoid the scary childhood I had,” she says. She earned a bachelor’s in finance from Adelphi University and underwent additional training to become a Certified Financial Planner. Today, Santoriello leads her own firm, King of Prussia-based DS Financial Strategies. 
 
Ironically, Santoriello was not always good with her own money. She recalls a time early in her financial-planning career when she did not have enough money to pay a parking-garage fee. With no cash in her wallet, $200 to her name, and a credit card that kept getting declined, she had to wait for the parking attendant to let her go without paying the fee. She was mortified. 
 
“I realized I was spiritually blocked around money, and all of my analytical skills couldn’t save me,” says Santoriello. She met a spiritual coach, Lynn Rene MacDonald, who taught her how to clear her emotional and spiritual blocks and manifest the financial freedom she sought.
 
“I know it sounds a little ‘woo-woo,’” she says, “but once I opened myself up to the power of prayer and created a vision board, I was able to clear my money blocks, open the doors to wealth, and change my own finances in a way I didn’t think was possible.”
 
Santoriello recently wrote a book, The Spiritual Path To Prosperity … The Truth About Money Revealed. The book offers simple illustrations to help people properly invest their money, create a spending plan, get out of debt, save for college, purchase life insurance, and save for retirement. It also details the subconscious money blocks that tend to prevent others from reaching their financial goals. She describes the five most notable money blocks as: prioritizing the needs of others over your own; money secrecy; lacking confidence in your knowledge; uncertainty and decision paralysis; and lacking trustworthy financial advice.
 
“Money is a tool to create the life you want,” she says. “While there are many external obstacles we face in dealing with money, internal money blocks often stand in the way of our clarity and confidence. To move forward, you must shift your mindset and clear what keeps you stuck in your pattern. … The key is to replace each block with what you would like to believe [about money] instead.”
 
For example, she says someone who lacks confidence in their financial knowledge because they believe they are not good with numbers should flip that belief to say, “I am good with numbers, and I also have my calculator to verify my data.” 
 
“People always seem to think dealing with money is something they can put on the back burner, to deal with it later,” she says. “They may not have a specific need or may not be sure where to start.” 
 
Through her book and other avenues of outreach, she hopes to provide people with a foundation for not only where to start, but also how to move forward into lives of financial freedom.
—Mindy Toran
    
Published (and copyrighted) in Suburban Life magazine, January 2022.